So are you sitting comfortable? Having something to drink? Today the story shall be told, why I didn't choose an Art study when I was younger. Man! I tweaked a lot in this post, it was waaay too long! I do hope you guys get more insight, otherwise let me know if you still have questions.
'Why not Arts?'. I said it a lot out loud so many times, but all I heard was an echo through my room and the question was bounced back at me again -_-'. Usually I wondered about this when things at school got a bit too frustrated. In my mind, I wanted to have a safety net, a 'society approved' study as back up. Also I still didn’t believe that my drawing skills could get me somewhere.
After high school graduation, I choose Human Resources (HR). It did faintly cross my mind to do an Art study, but I heard a lot from my surroundings that it was an study with a high level of job uncertainty, a lot of competition bla bla bla. HR it was. This study didn’t turn out as I really hoped. They inconveniently decided to implement a new study system, with coaching methods, individual development. I really, really disliked reflecting on myself and others in my group. What made it worse is that I had a coach who was really sticking to the system and who gave everyone a hard time with questions like: ‘Why would you do that?”, “What would you do differently?” etc. Now when I look back, it did give me a better insight in a lot of things. But I can assure you it was a pain in the ass to go through.
At school, this feeling that I just didn’t quite fit, kept lingering around me, but I didn’t had the courage to stop with HR. I’ve always been the youngest in my class and here the gap between me and fellow students seemed a lot bigger. Next to the age difference, a lot already did internships or worked in companies. They had actual work experience. All I had were text book examples and knowledge. The thing was when I choose HR, I was interested in what the study had to offer. But you develop and grow as a person while you study too and I find so many things interesting (really. I can be so tiring towards myself.), so after a while I was getting a bit restless and my interests shifted again. But dropping out of school, was too easy for me and I was already half way, so I decided to finish HR. I kept doodling of course, but I never considered myself to be an artist, even though a lot of people did. Therefore, I was still unsure about an Arts study.
There were signs throughout the years, that pointed me towards Arts. But you always see these signs, when you look back. When they actually happen, you are not aware of them. So, I felt trapped in my own creativity. I wanted to draw, but I was afraid that my love for drawing would disappear, if I took a more serious take with it.
Things happen for a reason and who knows, maybe I wouldn't be drawing in the way like I do now? All I know is, that life is all about making choices and I do think that if you're meant to do something in life, it will cross your path until you realize you have to do something with it.
But you need to have the faith, patience, passion and courage to do what you really want in life. Fear to disappoint myself and disbelief kept me from doing what I want. Nothing is impossible, you can however, make it impossible by thinking it is.
Take care everyone!